On of these occurred in Memphis, Tennessee a number of years ago. I had just finished some exams for my Doctor of Ministry work at Harding Graduate School. It was Thursday evening and I was going to stay over at a friend's apartment. (We were living in Alabama at the time). The friend worked at Federal Express. He got off work at midnight. I got to his apartment about 8:00 PM, I brought in a pizza and got ready to watch a football game on television.
I stepped into the restroom to wash my hands and the facet just broke off. Water went everywhere. I quickly looked under the sink for a cut-off. NO CUTOFF! OH GREAT! Meanwhile, the sink quickly filled and then spilled on to the floor and then a river began to head toward the adjacent room. I ran to the telephone and called the apartment office. No answer.
I saw a vacuum cleaner and removed the hose. I then sat on the commode lid with one end of the hose on top of the broken faucet, catching the water and the other end of the hose pointed toward the bathtub. One arm stretched to the right catching the water. The other arm stretched to the left, holding the other end of the hose toward the tub. This is just great!!
Then someone started pounding on the door to the apartment. I yelled for the person to come in. He opened the door and yelled something about water coming into his apartment. He then cames into the bathroom, where I was sitting on a commode lid holding the vacuum cleaner hose. He was drunk. When he saw the river of water beginning to cover my friends bedroom, he screamed a string of profanities. He went outside to find a cut-off but couldn't find one. So--he went to find some manager who was supposed to be in this huge complex somewhere.
Meanwhile, I was in this bathroom, sitting on a commode lid, holding a vacuum cleaner hose. One hand holding it on the broken facet. The other hand holding the other end as it drained into the bathtub.
Then, the self-pity started:
- The Dallas Cowboys are playing a Thursday night game on television.
- I have a pizza in the kitchen I haven't touched.
- My friend's apartment is being flooded by water.
- My friend is coming home from work at midnight and he will be greeted by this river of water.
- I am sitting on a commode lid, one arm stretched to the right, the other arm stretched to the left, holding the end of a vacuum cleaner hose in each hand, depending on a drunk guy to get help.
How long is eternity? That night, I think I found a new example. I felt like I waited FOREVER for the drunk guy to return. Finally, about midnight, the apartment maintenance man came in with the drunk guy following him, cussing at him for not having a cut-off nearby. The guy turned the water off outside and I surveyed the damage.
A few minutes later, my friend, who had just got off work, walked into his apartment. He listened as his feet made a squishing sound with every step. "Uhhh, let me explain." He said he had called the manager several times earlier in the week to get the facet fixed. Now he was aggravated with the manager.
Meanwhile, I sat down to eat cold pizza that had arrived four hours earlier. This was the end of a "terrible, horrible, no-good day." :)